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When Kirkland & Ellis sent a junior associate to a status conference, Eastern District of New York Judge Nicholas Garaufis had a bit of a fit. For the BigLaw firm to send an associate instead of a partner, for it to “think so little of this court,” was “outrageous, irresponsible, and insulting,” Garaufis said. Then he refused to continue the conference. “I’ve been a lawyer for 41 years and a judge for 16 years and I’m not having this discussion with you,” he told the Kirkland associate, according to the New York Daily News....

In a patent infringement and breach of nondisclosure agreement (NDA), involving patents directed toward apparatuses and methods of creating and verifying authenticity of documents such as postage, district court’s judgment is vacated in part, reversed in part, and remanded where: 1) the judgment of noninfringement is vacated as the district court erred in construing the claims; and 2) district court’s grant of summary judgment on the breach of contract claim is reversed as there are material issues of fact in dispute regarding breach of the NDA due to misuse of the confidential information....

An 18-year sentence for revenge porn? It’s more likely than you think. Last week, the San Diego Superior Court sentenced 28-year-old Kevin Bollaert to 18 years in prison for operating a revenge porn website. Well, sort of. Bollaert was also convicted of identity theft and extortion because he put photos on his website, then asked for between $250 and $350 from the women in the photos in exchange for taking the photos down....

It’s a high standard to meet, but a law school dropout has successfully argued “undue hardship” to get more than $339,000 in student loans discharged. Her undue hardship: Asperger’s syndrome, a form of autism, according to a judge’s ruling. As most current and former law students know, even filing for bankruptcy generally doesn’t relieve one’s duty to repay student loans. Only when a court finds an “undue hardship” exists will a student loan be discharged....

CNN had an interesting headline late last week: “Why are lawyers killing themselves?” This isn’t news. Our industry is rife with depression, substance abuse, and predictably, yet tragically, a high rate of suicide. A legal career often means loneliness, financial pressure, job stress, and adversarial system that pits us against each other in court-sanctioned cock fights. Tack on clients and opposing counsel that are frequently out for blood and it’s not a wonder that our profession ranks fourth in suicides, per the Centers for Disease Control, behind dentists, pharmacists, and physicians....

A Missouri man who tried to “rob” a store to get sent back to prison has finally gotten his wish – though, as the judge explained, he was technically too polite to have committed a robbery. Roy Murphy, 43, was arrested on allegations that he entered a convenience store in November, telling the clerk to “open the register, please” and “[p]lease call the police,” reports the St. Joseph News-Press. Murphy then fled and was arrested by the St....

Somebody didn’t tell Ronnie Menard how it works at the strip club. The 19-year-old Florida man asked for a lap dance at Fantasy’s at the Beach but tried to steal a Fort Myers stripper’s money during the dance. Now Menard is being charged with grand theft. Theft, also known as larceny is the taking of something of value without the consent of the owner, with the intent to permanently deprive him or her of it, also known casually as stealing....

Most of your clients likely have an LLC or PLLC after their names. Some might be individuals, sure. But its hard to imagine too many clients pulling something as strange and wacky as what Michael Kevin Lallana pulled at his job. Convicted of two misdemeanor counts of battery for ejaculating into his co-worker’s water bottle, an Orange County judge recently sentenced him to 180 days in jail, three years probation, and ordered him to register as a sex offender....

An older millionaire. A sexy divorcee, who lived with him. And her former NFL linebacker boyfriend. You know what happened next. Linebacker murdered the millionaire, she ripped off the estate, and they nearly got away with it, until they didn’t. It’s the subject of a true crime novel, and the plot line of many made-for-television movies. It’s also the subject of an unpublished appeals court decision due to the long delay between the murder and the charging and prosecution of the case....

Upset over his lack of erotic material, Kyle Richards, 21, is suing the state of Michigan on the grounds that a local prison porn ban constitutes cruel and unusual punishment under the 8th Amendment. Proceeding in pro per (or writing his own pleading to the court without an attorney), he claims that Macomb County Jail’s porn ban is a “method of ‘psychological warfare’ against prisoners” that aims to break their spirits via sensory deprivation....

The FBI has gotten involved in the Rutgers basketball scandal involving coach Mike Rice. Surprisingly, the target of the FBI investigation is whistleblower Eric Murdock, and possible extortion charges, and not Rice himself. Before the video of Rice abusing players was leaked to ESPN, a lawyer representing Murdock allegedly reached out to Rutgers University and demanded $950,000. Murdock had been an assistant coach under Rice and had just been recently terminated, reports The New York Times....

It’s not uncommon to hear about law students and alumni suing law schools these days – the job market is terrible, and people are struggling under the burden of unemployment and law school debt – but it’s interesting when an alumna suggests that a professor at her law school is interfering with her ability to find employment. And it’s downright sensational when the unemployed lawyer is a Stanford Law School graduate....

The spirit of Texas political observer and legendary humorist Molly Ivins must be itching to pound a keyboard over this legal news from the Lone Star State. This week the Supreme Court of Texas reportedly took up a most pressing legal issue: the constitutionality of the $5 dollar admission fee required at all state strip clubs. While the Texas State Board of Education considers easing Thomas Jefferson from his place in the history books, the question the state Supreme Court will address with all their legal wisdom is: does this pole tax impermissibly chill the right of the strippers (and club owners) to engage in expression protected under the First Amendment?...

Do you ever get the feeling that your current salary isn’t enough? You’re not the only one. But many employees become terrified of the prospect of sitting down with their employer to negotiate higher compensation – and with good reason. It’s your livelihood you’re talking about it. But the salary negotiation process doesn’t have to be a debilitating exercise. With a little preparation, you can make your best go and hopefully walk away with a little something more in your pocket....

Memorial Day weekend is upon us, and as the unofficial start to summer, that means one thing – getting ready for the beach. And while we lawyers spend a great deal of time reading at work, many of us like to read when we’re “off duty” as well. So as you squish your toes in the sand, and lean back in your lounge chair with a pina colada in one hand, here are our top ten summer books that you should be holding in your other hand....

We have an explanation! The TSA’s official blog – an amazing place to calm (or stoke) your airport security rage – has finally addressed TSA Cupcakegate. The latest in confectionary scandals occurred last month when security at a Las Vegas airport confiscated Rebecca Hains’ cupcake. Fortunately, Hains did not lose her cupcake in vain. No, she lost it so you and I can have a better explanation of the TSA’s 3-1-1 rule....

Is a website a place? That’s basically the question that a panel of Ninth Circuit judges needs guidance on, and has certified to the California Supreme Court. Background Earlier this month, the Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals heard a case involving California law. The case was initiated by the Greater Los Angeles Agency on Deafness (“GLAD”) against CNN, for its lack of closed captioning on its online videos. GLAD brought its claims under California’s Unruh Civil Rights Act (“Unruh”) and the California Disabled Persons Act (“DPA”) and sought damages, declaratory, and injunctive relief....

Last week the Supreme Court heard arguments in a duo of cases regarding attorney fees in patent cases, and the meaning of the Patent Act’s Section 285 language that allows a “court in exceptional cases may award reasonable attorney fees to the prevailing party.” The arguments were concluded before the two-hours allotted for argument, and the most exciting news from the Supreme Court was unrelated to attorney fees, notes SCOTUSblog....

Armed robbers may want more than the contents of your pockets; they may demand your pants too. A Tulsa man had his car, dignity, and pants stripped from him Sunday by a pair of armed robbers, who approached the victim while he was refueling his car, reports the Tulsa World. Armed robbery and carjacking are definitely illegal. But pantsing? The two suspects in the case allegedly approached and threatened the victims at a gas station with a gun, according to the Tulsa World....

Baltimore attorney Stanley Needleman is facing the law more than he’s arguing it lately. First, the feds raided the criminal lawyer’s office and home, finding more than $600,000 in cash. Now, he is accused of stealing a textbook from a courthouse. Yeah, that’s right. Needleman has been charged with one count of theft of under $100 for the textbook. He allegedly pilfered the legal volume, “Understanding White Collar Crime,” from court clerk Bradford Gorney, reports the Baltimore Sun....