Why does a cop use a rubber penis?

To bust prostitutes, of course.

A Florida undercover cop caught 31-year-old Christina Hope Vavra using the “flaccid” plastic prosthetic decoy. He wrote a surprisingly detailed police report about the incident, including the appearance of a possum.

Here is a timeline of the actual event:

  • Vavra got into the vehicle, and directed the undercover cop to drive.
  • She then got down to business and asked the cop to expose his private parts.
  • The cop asked her if he could put on a condom.
  • He whipped out the rubber penis and put a condom on it.
  • Vavra began to ply her trade.
  • At this point, a possum ran across the road.
  • The cop slammed on the brakes.
  • Vavra slid out of her seat and hit the dashboard.

Yes, a possum almost foiled this masterful plot.

Luckily, the officer was able to complete the undercover op. Vavra was taken into custody and booked on a prostitution charge.

Surprised that a cop used a rubber penis during this prostitution bust? You shouldn’t be. Using a rubber penis to fool suspected prostitutes is apparently a common law enforcement practice, according to a Manatee County Sheriff’s Office spokesman.

What are some takeaways from this story? For one, perhaps police should learn some defensive driving techniques to help avoid possums-related incidents. That said, have you seen pictures of possums? They’re pretty frightening, especially when startled or angry. A snarling possum is not a pretty sight.

What else is there to learn from this story? Maybe that a prostitute should figure out if the object they are getting up close and personal with is actually made out of flesh before it’s too late.

Related Resources:

  • Report: Possum Ends Prostitute Liaison With Undercover Deputy (WPBF-TV)
  • Man with Dead Weasel Bursts into Home, Assaults Man (FindLaw’s Legally Weird)
  • California Man Killed by Rooster at Cockfight (FindLaw’s Legally Weird)
  • Squirrel’s Flag Theft Caught on Camera by Toledo Police (FindLaw’s Legally Weird)

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